What is Making Too Many Kids Fat? by Randi L. Levin
Posted By Randi on May 2, 2012
What is making too many kids Fat?
I ask this question for while searching for any new solutions to the ever rising Childhood Obesity disorder, everyone seems to mention food diets and calorie counts, nutritional eating and exercise. Yikes! Yes, obesity is definitely related to the over-eating of poor food choices and lack of exercise. However, occasionally weight gains can be the result of medications prescribed and some of those meds can pack on extra weight; hence a person may appear to be severely overweight or obese when they are not. And the experts have forgotten that we all came out of different molds, and some of us have bigger bones and body frames than others; thus we don’t all fit into the same pattern molds or standard BMI ratings.
Thus, I find myself wondering if we as a nation grown so obsessed over food exercise and body images that we are neglecting the primary cause of childhood obesity that can lead to adult obesity. In fact, until the medical and nutritional professionals begin to acknowledge that food is not the primary cause of childhood obesity, and that is not going to be resolved by teaching children how to count all calories and nutrients while rigorously exercising for 60 minutes a day! Yes these attempts are helpful, but sorry most non-athletic children would rather play for 60 minutes than rigorously exercise! And reality be told, children are not born fat; Childhood Obesity develops as a result of poor choices learned behaviors, cognitive thoughts and lousy habits developed early in life. And until these professionals acknowledge that they first must help children and parents overcome poor habits, sedentary behaviors and unhealthful choices this epidemic is not going to go away.
Sure, there is a current battle going on relative to personal responsibility………. yet the medical/nutritional professionals continue to focus on food exercise dieting, and caloric counts. Yes, several children have been helped by the mass of current programs, but many more continue to get fat and fatter. Is it possible that people don’t like being told what to do or that too many continue to lack access to real foods; and I am sorry but pushing your kids to go outside to play in a gang or drug invested neighborhood may not be the most optimal choice? Yet this should not be used as an excuse to do nothing to get your kids more physically active!
So what needs to change? In answer, the attitude toward Childhood Obesity; and the development of an openness and acceptance that to prevent or overcome Childhood Obesity first you must help the family as a whole overcome poor choices and habits. Actually until you can help an individual or family overcome poor choices and habits all the nutritional information available becomes obsolete to those in need.
For Example:
1. Many moms or dads choose keep the baby happy and occupied with food nibbles (usually small crackers or cereal bits) while the parent works, plays on the computer or completes chores. However, for some when the baby finishes the nibbles and begins to giggle trying to get attention and then fails, the baby begins to cry. Instead of picking up the baby and playing with it (dancing singing practicing walking etc.), more edible nibbles are offered to quiet the baby’s tears and screams.
Hence the parent made a choice to ignore the baby’s cry for attention and offered them more food instead. And the baby in response can unconsciously learn that the behavior of eating provides for comfort passes the time and may possibly learn to perceive such as a substitute for love!
2. Granted many kids ride bikes or walk to convenience stores as a pastime after school or on weekends. They meet up with friends, play have fun etc. But for some kids going to the local convenience is a way to feel a sense of belonging if only temporarily! I have personally witnessed a local overweight child going to a convenience store; yet not for necessarily for candy and treats but more so for companionship. He shows up alone, spends more than $5 on candy, drinks and little cakes and then sits on the front step waiting for other kids to arrive, munching slowly as if eating. Once other kids show up he offers them his treats. Sure they accept them eagerly while standing around talking. Yet once the treats are gone the other children go their own way; leaving this kid is alone once again so he hangs his head and walks back home.
Is the candy and treats the main issue here? Absolutely not! Rather they are purchased as an act to make some temporary friends and to feel a part of something if even for a short period of time.
FYI: After talking with this young man about what was happening and getting his permission to talk to his mom—together we came up with a plan. He would start helping the PE Teacher before school to help prepare the gym for the day ahead by moving the equipment around. Little did this young man know many of the local school athletes worked out in the gym/weight room before school and he would be helping in there too.
Sure he was initially intimidated, but followed through with support and encouragement. To make a few months shorter he began to some develop real and binding friendships in that gym, and soon the other kids had him working with some weights challenging him with cheers to add more weight to the bar. He began to smile more feeling more confident in himself and the extra weight naturally came off as muscle replaced the flab. Yet the best part was he no longer felt he had to buy temporary friendships and choose to be a member and helper for the school sport programs instead! Even his “treat” buddies began to say hi to him in school, something they never did before!
Hence, just a little bit of caring words and encouragement can alter poor choices into ones of joy, happiness and better health!
3. A couple years ago while visiting a Farmer’s Market I noticed an overweight mom wheeling her 3 kids around in a stroller type wagon. Granted one of her children had some slight special needs, but she didn’t have the 2 healthy children walk with her preferring to drag them all around in the wagon type stroller; although they could walk and run just fine, even though one was overweight.
How do I know? Not all her children had Special Needs and the other (8-10 years old) willingly got out of the contraption to run to different vendors for soda, to get a giant doughnut or cookie and later on a snow cone once handed some money. Of course Mom was also brought back a fattening treat. Yet what was weird is that this was a Farmer’s Market not a zoo. There were many healthful offerings of foods samples from peaches melons to cherries to pure juices and cucumbers tomatoes peppers and carrots too. Even some whole grain bread samples were offered to sample on. Yet this Mom allowed her children to perpetrate the most fattening offerings there over the healthier ones. Amazingly about 2-3 hours after arriving all the children in her stroller type wagon and her were miserably cranky and all were screaming or crying at one another. Interestingly, this Mom held onto and sipped her extra-large soda the whole time as she wheeled them back to the car.
WOW! IMAGINE THAT!
This mom had good intentions to keep her kids’ occupied and happy, yet she chose to make some poor choices and the result was a sugar rush that crashed hard which led to yelling crankiness and some tears in all of them. Also, she may have unconsciously taught her kids to go for the more sugary items at events and at Farmer’s Market rather than promoting and encouraging purchases of more healthful options. (Children will often unconsciously model their parent’s behaviors and choices.)
YES the CHOICE OF FOOD/beverages she made for them (by agreeing) ultimately caused her family to spiral downward into crankiness and misery. On the other hand, had she made wiser choices such as bringing or purchasing water over soda, while sampling and purchasing fruits/veggies for her family to munch on, they would have experienced a much happier time and better day together. Instead they all went home cranky and miserable.
Did the food/beverage make these kids and mom cranky—YES! But it was their Mom’s poor choice to allow them to sit not walk and to allow them to purchase sugar saturated products over healthier more natural options. Are Moms always at fault, no of course not? However in this instance, simply by her holding that huge soda and not directing her children to sample or purchase something more healthful—she chose to make them cranky and thus had to deal with their crankiness for hours yet to come. It was her choice and by making such she was unconsciously teaching her children how to develop poor eating/drinking habits and culinary choices.
It is obvious why her children got cranky, and possibly why one was so overweight. Mom may have unconsciously taught them to chose unhealthy over healthier foods at events and for life!
4. There was a young family in my neighborhood. The daughter was as an infant when adopted and always seemed to be overweight and getting bigger as she grew older. Mom and dad were fit ate relatively healthy, and exercised by walking. Yet I couldn’t help but notice that Mom always dropped off and picked her daughter up from the bus stop. Granted the road up to their house was steep. Yet this was a kid of 13-14 at the time and she could walk just fine.
One day while meandering around the neighborhood with my dog, I asked her why her wasn’t daughter walking to and from the bus stop. I was teaching at the time and reminded her mom that some kids were picking on (bullying) her daughter because of her weight and calling her nasty names. Mom being a good and protective mom tried to defend her child, until I let her know that I occasionally saw her munching on candy and little cakes in-between classes and that in Gym she rarely ever participated in the games but did follow the routines without enthusiasm.
Mom once again questioned the truth. She let me know that she doesn’t have candy and cakes in the house unless she bakes them herself. SO I asked her Mom to check her room for the hoard of stashes. To make a longer story short, she felt such was intrusive and did not want to. And then I told her that I have heard one of my students refer to her as “Miss Piggy” and mom got horrified. (Yes this student of mine got 3 days of detention by me for abusing another knowing that he too was abused just in a different way. (Yes he did apologize to her and felt bad!)
Needless to say Mom thanked me and we walked partially home together. Although hesitant she said she would check her daughter’s room. She called me about an hour later in tears asking how I knew. She had found several bags of candy and a couple boxes of little cakes stored under the bed, in the closet an in jacket pockets.
At this point we discussed that just because she may have been born with big bones and a big but compacted body frame; this is not an excuse for being fat and obese—she was almost 75 lbs. overweight at the time that this all began. Then I asked Mom what she was going to do about her find. She didn’t know at this point but knew that her daughter was going to start walking up and down to the bus stop from now on; unless the weather was bad—as if storming. We talked about getting her into the Recreation Center to participate in work-out routines but that cost extra money that they currently did not have. Ahh, but then again we live in the country, she can walk and explore her surroundings, such as going up the big hill behind some homes to see the mountains and maybe find a cool rock to bring back to the garden along her journey.
Once this Mom calmed down a bit she decided to confront her child with the candy and cakes and let her daughter decide what to do with them. (Good Decision Mom!) The next morning I saw her daughter looking miserable as she grudgingly dragged her knapsack down the road to the bus stop for the first time. As I watched the phone rang and it was her mom. She sounded relieved. Yes there were many tears the night before, but progress was made and her daughter chose to gift her stash to a shelter in the community for those in need. (Good Choice Kid!).
A couple months went by and this young lady was smiling more and more, she began to kind of jog to and from the bus stop with that knapsack on her back instead of dragging it. She was losing some of that extra weight and felt lighter and better about herself as a result and you could see it in her face and in her step. Yet the best part is that you could finally see just how pretty she was and that boy who used to call her “Miss Piggy” asked her out to the school dance. Months went by and this once obese child though still big in bone and body looked gorgeous and healthy in her gown. Mom made some new choices too and began baking more healthful treats at home, including making some homemade dark chocolate candies for nibbling on. (See the Love More Feed Less Cookbook for Dark Chocolate Candy Recipes.) Mom knew that an occasional treat was Ok and that if it was homemade it would cost less and was much more healthful than the prepackaged treats.
5. I must share this last one for it may hit home for some of you reading this. Keep in mind that I was a Special ED teacher and occasionally helped the DD and Down Syndrome students at the school. My Special Olympic buddy was overweight as are many children with Down syndrome tend to be (though not all!). ( I had to leave teaching and my mental health career due my own medical disorder.)
Long story short 14 years after I left the school I wrote a cookbook to help others at higher elevations adjust their recipes accordingly and won best in the (whole wide) world with it. News got out locally about the award, and this student’s mom called me wanting a copy. She let me know other moms’ also wanted a copy so we set up a small get together at the Rec Center where some of former Special Needs students still participated in swim class.
Ok so I drove to the Rec Center and we had a nice reunion! I asked the mom who initially called if my former Special Olympics buddy would remember me after so long. She pointed to where she was by the pool about the same time my former student saw me and started to do a jig (one, we shared if we both made it down the ski mountain without falling); when I noticed her overly large belly. It was just after this moment that mom and I took a short walk outside where I informed that this young lady now had Type 2 Diabetes and was on 2-3 shots a day. So we talked about how weight reduction may get off of those shots, I shared a few tips and she grudgingly agreed.
(Please be aware that a time of this conversation mother and daughter were drinking at least a 6 pack or more day of soda!)
Once the class was over my former student came over to me and together we hugged and walked outside to catch up. Yet when mom got up too she knew something was up. Outside I asked her how much she liked the shots—–evidently she hated them! SO I asked if she wanted to get off of them and she eagerly bobbed her head up and down! This is when I told she had to lose weight to get off of those needles. Oooh boy did she start to get fidgety and refused to look at me anymore. I then told her that mom and I talked and decided no more soda pop, no more little cakes unless homemade, NO more candy stashed in the pockets (she pulled out several pieces from her pocket at this point and gave them to me without raising her head) and that she and mom had to take a walk for 30-45 minutes 3-4 days per week. Yes, you can bet that she stamped her feet and adamantly said NO! I said YES, Mom said YES and she knew she had no choice as the lower lip came out while her head dropped to her chest. But, because we were buddies she finally pinky swore with me that she would do it to get off of those shots!
4- 5 months later she had dropped enough weight to get off those shots but was monitored daily by mom and quarterly by the Doctor. Both mom and daughter appeared happier and looking healthier and mom said things were now easier at home for now both were not as cranky as they used to be.
In summary sometimes a parent’s denial or choices made to please can cause unintentional pains and frustration for their children until they the parent(s) Step Up and decide to “MAKE THAT CHANGE” for the sake of their kid’s health and over all well-being!
This event happened a few years ago; today both are lighter in weight, happier and the diabetes has not come back as of the date of this article.
In summary as the medical nutritional world combine their efforts they neglect that it possible that the person is not yet sick and in need of medical nutritional info to heal their ailments! As they try to develop healthier standards, they neglect that obesity is matter of poor habitual choices combined with emotions, cognitive thoughts and denials! Hence until you help and subtly guide a family or individual to overcome such bad choices and habits—they don’t hear the Nutritional and Healthy Messages as they have chosen not too.
